My faith is so weak.  I know in my mind that God is sovereign, that He is totally and absolutely in control of everything, that His will will be accomplished in and through my life, and that He is previous - He has already gone before me.  Now, one logical result of this knowledge should be an unwavering peace about the future, but I don't have that.  The future, the unknown, is exciting, but it terrifies me.  Why?  Because I'm not resting in God's sovereignty, because I want to be in control, because I don't want to submit.  I want to know who I'm going to marry and when, where I'm going to live after our lease is up, what would happen if I didn't pass a test, if I should move and where to, etc.  Why?  Because I don't want to be hurt, I don't want things to be difficult, never thinking about what the Lord might teach me, how He would grow me through those situations.  Basically, my thoughts are so self-centered rather than centered on the Lord and the truth I know about Him.

The sermon on Sunday was from Exodus 15, and it was very convicting.  In case you need a refresher, the Israelites have just been led out of Egypt and seen Pharaoh's army swallowed up by the very sea God had parted for them to walk through.  Then the journey begins...they head for the wilderness, and after traveling for 3 days without a drop of water, they reach Marah and there it is.  Can you imagine seeing a body of water?  The excitement you would feel and the desperation to reach it's shore and soothe your parched body?  Your thirst it finally going to be satisfied!  You rush towards it with the rest of the throng, finally reaching the edge, and dip your hands in, bringing them to your cracked lips.  You breathe deeply before you drink, eagerly anticipating the relief that is soon to come, and then you take your first sip.  It spews from your mouth!  It's just terrible, so bitter that you can't even drink it!  What a disappointment...then the complaining begins.
The very thing that they thought would bring satisfaction turned out to be a bitter disappointment, and rather than remembering God's faithfulness in the past and that He was the one who led them there and had already gone ahead of them to prepare the way, they complained.  I'm afraid I am all too often like the Israelites in this respect.

Christmas in a Cup(cake)

PEPPERMINT MOCHA CUPCAKES

CUPCAKES
Ingredients:

• 2 1/2 sticks unsalted butter, room temp
• 6 eggs, room temp
• 1 cup buttermilk
• 3 cups sugar
• 2 tsp vanilla
• 1 cup strong, hot coffee
• 2 1/2 cups cake flour
• 1 cup cocoa powder
• 2 tsp baking soda
• 1/2 tsp baking powder
• 1 tsp salt

Directions:

1. Preheat oven to 325.
2. Cream butter and sugar together until fluffy, about 3-5 minutes.
3. Add eggs and beat an additional 2 minutes.
4. Whisk or sift flour, cocoa, baking soda, baking powder, and salt together.
5. Mix buttermilk and vanilla together.
6. Add 1/3 of flour mixture to butter mixture and mix.
7. Beat in buttermilk mixture.
8. Add 1/3 of flour mixture.
9. Add coffee.
10. Beat in remaining flour mixture and mix until combined.
11. Spoon batter into paper-lined cupcake trays, filling halfway.
12. Bake 15-20 minutes or until toothpick inserted in the center comes out clean.
13. Cool for 5 minutes in tin and then remove to baking rack to cool.

FILLING

Ingredients:

• 1 cup whipping cream
• 2 (8-oz) packages cream cheese, room temp
• 1 1/4 tsp pure peppermint extract
• 1 1/2 - 2 cups powdered sugar

Directions:

1. Beat whipping cream until forms soft peaks.
2. Add cream cheese and peppermint and beat.
3. Add powdered sugar until reaches desired sweetness and beat until smooth.
4. Fit pastry bag with plain tip.
5. Fill pastry bag with filling (will have to do several times).
6. Insert tip into middle of each cupcake and squeeze filling into cupcake.

FROSTING

Ingredients:

• 12 oz semi-sweet chocolate
• 4 sticks butter (1-lb), room temp
• 2 egg yolks, room temp
• 2 tsp vanilla
• 2 1/2 cups powdered sugar
• 2 tbsp espresso powder
• pure peppermint extract

Directions:

1. Melt chocolate and cool to room temp.
2. Beat butter until light and fluffy, about 3 min.
3. Add egg yolks and vanilla, and beat another 3 min.
4. Gradually add powdered sugar, scraping down sides and beating until smooth and creamy.
5. Add melted chocolate and espresso powder.
6. Add peppermint to taste.

*I piped the frosting in a ring around the outer part of the cupcake, filled the middle of the ring with my left-over filling, and sprinkled crushed candy canes on top.
*Makes 36

...from the lips of a child

Today in Sunday school, we talked about how the wise men worshipped Jesus and ways we can worship Him too.  We discussed how telling others about God is one way we worship Him, so for our craft we made Christmas cards for the kids to give to their friends/neighbors to tell them about Christ.  Most of the children drew Mary, Joseph, and Jesus on their cards, but one little girl did something different.  On the front of her card, Lilly drew a hill with three crosses on it.  I asked her what she had drawn, and she replied, "The cross, because that's why Jesus was born."  She then asked for help to write something on the back..."Jesus came as a baby to die for our sins."  This precious 5-year-old reminded me of the truth that we so often forget - that the birth of Christ is not the end of the story - and for that, I am most thankful.

Peanut Butter Oreo Cupcakes

Ingredients:

• 1 can sweetened condensed milk
• 1 (8oz) package cream cheese
• 1 pint whipping cream
• 2-3 cups peanut butter
• 1 package oreos

Directions:

• Place 24 cupcake liners in muffin tins.
• Open 12 oreos (making 24 cookies), and place 1 cookie in each liner.
• Set 12 more oreos aside and crush the rest.
• Beat whipping cream until forms soft peaks.
• In separate bowl, beat cream cheese and condensed milk.  Add to whipping cream.
• Add peanut butter until you like how it tastes, and stir in the oreos.
• Spoon mixture into cupcake liners.
• Break remaining 12 oreos in half and place one half on the top of each cupcake.
• Freeze overnight.

I made these a few weeks ago to take to a going away party for a friend who just moved to China, but they were eaten before I got to try one.  And you can be praying for my friend...his name is Austin.

Meticulous Sovereignty

A few weeks ago at home group, Allen said something that has stuck with me..."for sovereignty to stand, it has to be meticulous."  Well, I know that the Lord is sovereign (thought I confess that I often don't live as if it is so), but I have never before given much thought to His meticulosity.  Think about it.  Once you do, you'll begin to notice it everywhere and in everything.


Have you ever thought about how many different kinds of grass and trees and bushes there are?  The sovereign Creator made countless varieties of each, and each is unique - some wither with the first frost while others can survive in a frozen tundra; some thrive in direct sunlight and others shrivel up and die; some produce poisonous fruit while others bear things that are good to eat; some remain green year-round and others have foliage that changes and falls with the seasons.  The Master specifically made each one the way it is; He is meticulously sovereign.


Now look at your life.  How awe-inspiring and humbling to realize that the one and only God is intimately involved in the most minute details of our lives!   He didn't just ordain where I would be born or go to school or work or live, but He sovereignly, specifically orchestrated each of the seemingly insignificant events and circumstances that led to these things.  If I had an earthly king and discovered that he knew about me and my life and was actually interested and involved in my everyday affairs, I would be humbly grateful that he had taken the time to learn about one of his subjects and therefore much more willing to submit to his rule.  How much more should my heart long to serve and worship the King of Kings who knows the number of hairs on my head, the One in whose book were written all the days that were ordained for me when as yet there was not one of them?

Mocha Dream Cream Cupcakes

So, these are the cupcakes I made this week for our family fun day at church...

Ingredients:

• Cake
• 2 sticks unsalted butter, room temp
• 1 cup brown sugar
• 3 eggs, room temp
• 1/2 cup buttermilk
• 1 t vanilla
• 4 oz semi-sweet chocolate
• 1/4 cup cocoa powder
• 1 1/4 cups boiling water
• 3/4 cup all-purpose flour
• 3/4 cup cake flour
• 1 t baking soda
• 1/4 t salt
• Filling
• 12 oz cream cheese (1 1/2 pkgs), room temp
• 2 oz semi-sweet chocolate
• 1/2 cup sugar
• 1 egg + 1 egg white (save yolk for icing)
• Frosting
• 6 oz semi-sweet chocolate, melted and cooled to room temp
• 2 sticks unsalted butter, room temp
• 1 egg yolk, room temp
• 1 t vanilla
• 1 1/4 cups powdered sugar, sifted
• 1 T instant expresso powder

Directions:

1. Preheat the oven to 350.
2. Chop chocolate for filling and cupcakes in food processor...I suggest you do it on low, because when I tried it on high, the chocolate began to melt.
3. Cream 2 sticks of butter and brown sugar for 3-5 minutes, until light and fluffy.
4. Add 3 eggs and beat another 3 minutes.
5. Add buttermilk and vanilla.
6. Mix boiling water and 4 oz chopped chocolate.
7. Sift flour, cocoa, baking soda, and salt into bowl.
8. Alternately add flour and chocolate mixtures to batter, beginning and ending with the flour mixture.
9. Pour batter into cupcake pans liked with paper liners, filling each 2/3 full.
10. Cream together all filling ingredients except chocolate for 3-5 minutes.  Fold in chopped chocolate.
11. Drop filling by the tablespoonful into the center of each cupcake...part of it will peek out the top.
12. Bake 18-20 minutes.

When they are cooled, begin the icing.

1. Beat butter on med-high about 3 minutes, until light yellow.
2. Add egg yolk and vanilla and beat another 3 minutes.
3. On low, gradually add powdered sugar, scraping down the sides of the bowl, then beat on medium until smooth and creamy.
4. Dissolve the espresso powder in 2 tsp of the hottest tap water.
5. On low, add the melted chocolate and espresso to the butter mixture and mix until blended...don't whip.
6. Spread on cupcakes and enjoy!

*Makes about 24 cupcakes.

If you are like me and don't have buttermilk, you can mix 1/2 cup milk and 1/2 T white vinegar and let it sit for 5 minutes.  I didn't know what cake flour was until not long ago and had to look it up...to sum it up, cake flour has a finer texture and is milled differently than other flours, making the cake/cupcakes lighter and fluffier.  It really does make a difference!